Visible Scars

I never thought about visible scars being a blessing…

I think sometimes people look at me and think I’m too weird, too silly, too immature, or too reckless. But I think to have visible scars, people also think, “Wow she went through some trauma… Wow, she can laugh the way she does after going through all that? It’s surprising she can still smile the way she does… Oh, that makes sense now.”

Sometimes having visible scars justify my actions… sometimes…

Being a trauma survivor is what makes me a part of who I am. Having visible scars lets people know I’m a survivor without having to tell them.

Some people don’t have that luxury. The luxury of having someone look at them and know they are a survivor. There are a few who don’t have visible scars. Countless survivors went through a trauma that no one knows about because they do not have visible scars. People do not have visible signs of pain they carry. They do not have visible signs of survival.

What they do have are visible smiles. They have visible laughs. They have visible joy. Their joy seems like naive joy. The kind of joy that has seen no pain. The type of happiness that make people in misery envy. “WHY ARE YOU SO HAPPY! WHY ARE YOU ABLE TO EXPERIENCE HAPPINESS WHILE I SUFFER IN ALL THIS AGONY?”

People don’t know. If only they knew. If only they knew about the girl sexually assaulted by her uncle. The scars are not visible. If only they knew he once had no eyebrows. The scars are not visible. If only they knew about this person’s battle on what gender to claim. The scars are not visible. If only they knew she watched her house burn down but her parents did not make it. The scars are not visible. If only they knew he grew up watching his mother get abused by his father. The scars are not visible. If only they knew she cried endlessly because they called her a slut for showing too much skin. The scars are not visible. If only they knew he couldn’t sleep at night from terrors that haunted him. The scars are not visible.

Her kisses are filled with true love and passion as she is held deeply. She is a survivor. You just can’t see her scars. He counts every single hair follicle as they grow. He is a survivor. You just can’t see his scars. They won their inner-battle fluidly. They are a survivor. You just can’t see their scars. She grabs her diploma, moves her tassel and she looks out into the crowd to see her family. She is a survivor. You just can’t see her scars. He watches his wife push their daughter on the swing. He is a survivor. You just can’t see his scars. She puts on her favorite top and looks in the mirror smiling brightly. She is a survivor. You just can’t see her scars. He drifts to a deep slumber filled with inspiring dreams. He is a survivor. You just can’t see his scars.

People see me. I have scars. You can see my scars. You can see my pain. You can see, I am a survivor. But you can’t see everything. You can’t see all my scars. You can’t see all my pain. I’m lucky. I’m blessed. You see me, and you see a survivor. You see me, and you see triumph.

Not everyone is as blessed.

Not everyone can see.

Not all scars are visible.

Not all survivors are acknowledged.

Not all triumphs are seen.

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17 Comments Add yours

  1. Shruti says:

    Wow Ruby! That was an amazing read and I love your outlook on life! I’ll look forward to more from you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. bettybrico says:

    You sound like an amazing woman. I have a blog about PTSD and I would LOVE to work with you-maybe do a guest blog collaboration or something? I don’t know! But if you’re interested please e-mail me: bettymama206@gmail.com If you’d like to see my blog it’s at http://www.bettysbattleground.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. aRukyzLife says:

      Yes OF COURSE!!!! We can definitely do it! Looking forward to reading your blogs and collaborating with you!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. elizabethbrico says:

        Awesome! I am looking forward to collaborating too! Yay :D!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Fantastic outlook on life. I try to adapt that outlook myself with the recent trauma With Outward visible scars I have, I am only 16 weeks out from surviving my traumatic event and am struggling with self confidence. But I stay bright and hopeful. Hearing stories like yours makes it so much easier for me to feel confident and proud again. Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. aRukyzLife says:

      I honestly feel like whenever a traumatic thing that occurs in our life there has to be a balance. Having scars opened more doors than I would have ever dreamed of! You’re a beautiful person and I hope you never forget that ^.^

      Like

  4. Rachel Erazo says:

    Abdolutely beautiful ❤️ True poetry. Thank you for this. It really helps 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  5. bwoker says:

    Thank you for sharing. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Melissa M. says:

    You are awesome and so inspiring! Can’t wait to read more posts. And would love to collaborate with you on a travel post sometime!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes!!! Once I go on this Eurotrip, I should have ample experience to write about!!!

      Like

  7. josypheen says:

    This is such a good post! You are such a positive star!! ❤

    Like

  8. Reblogged this on Pain Pals and commented:
    Those invisible scars can be the hardest to heal….remarkable post from Ruby on Throwback Thursday.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. This is so beautiful and touching. Thank you for such a thought-provoking post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it. Blogs like these always take me a few more moments to write because it’s so dear to me.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Littlethings says:

    oh wow..what a beautiful and encouraging blog i got today morning..
    it’s what i says a perfect start of the day!! thank you for writing this 🙂 great!!!

    Like

    1. Thank you so much! I’m glad it helped start your day!!!

      Like

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